Daddy’s Girl, A Poem

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If I haven’t shown it by now – not all things in life are rosy and cheery.  I’m going to assume I did not have to tell you that.  We have what we have.  We are what we are.  Our histories, not matter what they may be – have led us to who we are today.

 

I often try to delve headfirst into what makes my heart soar and my soul sing, but just as it is in life – sadness is also some part of us.  It is what helps us cherish all that we have now and sometimes, it helps us to understand a little bit more of who we are.  Being thankful for who I’ve become, includes being thankful for what I have been able to overcome.

 

In the end,

We walked away

Peacefully

In different directions

He felt

That he had known me

But he barely

Scraped the surface

And though he tended

His crops

The best that he knew how,

He had become complacent

In later years.

I – had grown distant

I – had grown up

And the hand

That once held my own

To steady me on my path

Wavered in its conviction

And the love with which

I was held

Crumbled in wanting.

Had I asked to much

To be cherished?

Had I shed too many tears

When the lashing

Was too much?

Was I just

Too needy –

A child with thoughtful eyes?

Silence held us

Far beyond our later years

The phone’s incessant reticence

Begged the truth –

My meaning

Was not

What I thought it was.

I had purpose once –

Or so I assumed

To hold his smile

To fill his heart

With compassion

And somewhere

Along the paths we traveled

I had lost my way.

 

© Sumyanna 2016

 

Gorgeous image courtesy of Pexels.

 

 

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11 Comments Add yours

  1. this is a very sensitive topic for me,makes me cry,your pen is a thing of beauty Sum,love and hugs

    Like

    1. Sumyanna says:

      I know it is difficult for you – but you have such good memories of him. I think he would be pleased knowing you have loved him all this time and that his time with you was meaningful. As parents, I think we all hope that.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Delyn Merce says:

    This is very moving. I had an odd dream the other night, unlike any I’d ever had–I dreamed that my dad came to my rescue at the time of my divorce, and told me he’d make sure my ex paid me everything he owed me. This was far from what happened, as my dad was dying of cancer as I was going through my divorce–there was no support for me whatsoever. So the dream was greatly comforting.

    Like

    1. Sumyanna says:

      Sounds like your divorce was not an easy one. Sorry to hear that. My parents divorce was like that – so sad to think what happened because of love can turn to something else. I think you would have liked his support at that time. So glad the dream gave you comfort. It can be hard being on your own.

      Like

      1. Delyn Merce says:

        Actually, it was easy–I just wanted out, and left with nothing but bare necessities. But according to the law, I should have received “half”–and I couldn’t fight for it on my own, so I didn’t. I don’t regret that aspect of it. The sense of failure and shame, and being treated so shabbily by others–that was really hard.

        Like

        1. Sumyanna says:

          Thank goodness for that. Some divorces can be downright horrendous! Yeah, it seriously can be unfair at times. I hope you know now though that you carry none of that failure or shame.

          Like

          1. Delyn Merce says:

            I never regained my trust, but have enjoyed a richly blessed solitary life 🙂

            Liked by 1 person

          2. Sumyanna says:

            I completely understand that. Sometimes it is better to be alone than to be unhappy.

            Like

          3. Delyn Merce says:

            Absolutely, that’s my view! 🙂

            Liked by 1 person

  3. this is beautiful ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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