Spring is finally here. Of course, that does not mean we will have no more snow. It always finds a way to creep in as late as April and sometimes May. In between, however, spring has found her song. I cannot say how thrilled I am by this… seeing as spring is my favorite season. I finally get to go out and take more photographs, I get to breathe in the fresh air, and linger at the gardens. What more could I wish for?
Now I know I have not been around lately, but sometimes things change a little bit and you have to take a step back, or two, or three. Things take time. First of all, I’ve been trying to keep a promise I have made myself… to make more time for me. Of course, you may think… then why haven’t you been around? The thing is… I try to take care of myself in all aspects of life, not only my writing. As important as writing and photography are to me… I also need to continue to take care of my health. Homeschooling is one of those things that can seriously get in the way of that commitment, especially when most of us are able to come up with all kinds of excuses to get out of exercise. Now – you really have excuses, but you have to refuse to let them stop you.
Over the past year, I have tried to pay attention to how many steps I made a day. Its useful because I have a watch that counts those, but there have been days when things were too hectic and my steps were nonexistent. The purpose of reevaluating things is that I told myself I needed to do more to fit in “me time” and not allow things to get in my way. At the end of the day, I have found that the more I spend time taking care of myself, the more I am physically and mentally present when I am busy. While I may be crunched for time, I get much more done. So I have not only be evaluating my physical activity, but also things like time management and planning. Funny to think that many believe homeschooling mothers just lay around all day 🙂
Anyway, another struggle I have had is with my camera. As you may have noticed… I love taking photos. I can’t explain it, but perhaps part of the reason is that when I take photographs, I get to go out in nature. Another reason is that this is one of the rare occasions that I allow myself to slow down. Strangely though, going through nature is not enough for me. If I go without my camera, I still see what I see with the camera and I feel bad that I did not take a picture of it. Go figure!
So this leads me to explain why I haven’t been sharing as many photos. Right before our vacation I got a new camera. Before this, my eyes were fine with minor adjustments with the camera and I needed no glasses. See, I’m gett up there 😉 and already my eyes are not working like they used to. I have only been wearing glasses for about two years, so this is such an adjustment for me. First of all, I have trifocals. If you’ve ever tried to take photos with those, you know exactly what I mean. Nothing stays in focus. So, when I got my new camera, things weren’t working properly. Although I could adjust the camera, images still came out blurry. I tried my trifocals which made more of a mess. I then went and got reading glasses to see if that would help. It has been a whirlwind of frustration and confusion over here.
I just went to my eye appointment and made sure to mention how important photography was to me. The doctor said some things that only clicked over time. In the meantime, I struggled to take good photos. Essentially, my eyes have different prescriptions for reading. I was never aware of this… because when I look through them using both eyes, they “seem” to work but when I use them for photography, things always came out unfocused in some way.
I brought my glasses that I found at the drugstore with what I thought was my proper reading level. At the gardens, I was frustrated because I knew that when I looked through the camera lens, things somehow still looked blurry. My daughter thought for a moment and suggested I try my other eye. Sure enough, things were clear, but when I took photos they were still a bit off because I wasn’t used to using that eye for the camera. Still, it was an aha moment! I ended up getting my glasses last night, so I am hoping that they will work much better than the ones I got at the store. I just can’t wait to try them out, but sadly… spring break is over already. Don’t worry though, I will get out there. I am determined.
I can finally say that I am ready to start sharing photos and will even go back over those I have taken under less than stellar circumstances. Some of them did manage to turn out, but I was so frustrated when I would get home that I refused to look at them again, let alone share. I hope you understand.
I guess I just feel fortunate that when things don’t seem right, when things don’t seem to be working, you can keep pushing forward and you will find an answer. I am not one to usually give up, though from my demeanor over these past months would make you wonder if I was going to pack up that camera. I’m glad I didn’t. I am finally at a point where I can start working on my skills with the camera, aside from actually seeing!